Sunday, December 21, 2014

10 Reasons why the second pregnancy is harder than the first

I'm gonna be honest with all you non-mommas out there...pregnancy is not easy. It's just not. If compared to a walk in the park it would be a park in the dark with limited visibility due to fog in the dead of winter with frozen rain pouring down in sheets in the bad part of town and you're only wearing a t-shirt and sandals.

Or to put it in fewer words, it's uncomfortable and unpredictable.

Now picture that same terrible walk-in-the-park situation with a toddler that you are trying to keep happy and entertained.

But if that wasn't a clear enough picture please enjoy as I present to you,

10 Reasons why the second pregnancy is harder than the first

1. You have to cook for someone else even though every smell makes you want to die.

Yeah, Evelyn has not mastered the culinary art yet and even though everything in the kitchen has a smell, including merely opening the fridge, I still have to get her food. You know, so she lives and is happy and all. When I was pregnant with her, I just avoided the kitchen altogether. Not really an option now.

2. Your perfect toddler wants you to play ALL THE GAMES but you're so tired, you can't think straight.

Everyday is the same. I get out of bed, still exhausted after 8 solid hours of sleep, lay on the couch and let Evelyn get toys out of her room. But she doesn't just play with them, she brings each one to me to play with her. Or she brings out all her books. I just wanted to close my eyes for another 15 minutes. During pregnancy number one, I slept all day and no one minded.

3. Every room in your house has become a complete and utter wasteland because you feel terrible and  tired and your child has traded her name in for, "The Destroyer."

Feeling too crappy to clean and Evelyn wrecks everything. When all her toys are everywhere she moves onto pulling clothes out of both of our dressers, shredding toilet paper, redecorating the kitchen, etc. And I just sit, and watch and cry. Last time I was preggo, the house wasn't clean but at least I didn't have a little monster running around making it even messier.

4. Even when you're having the worst day and feeling the sickest and most tired, you can't rest without feeling a tad guilty for parking your toddler in front of the television for the fourth day in a row.

She is finally content in front of the TV, playing by herself and I can close my eyes for a little bit but I can't shake the gnawing feeling that I'm turning her brain into mush. And the worst mother award goes to..

5. A little piece of you feels like you can't love the baby growing inside you as much as the one jumping on top of you.

I felt like I bonded with Evelyn the minute I found out I was pregnant and I was so thrilled to meet her. Of course that came with it's share of worry but this pregnancy is more worry than anything else. Evelyn has all my love and I won't have any left for the new baby. How in the world will I be able to handle two hellions? The list goes on.

6. Your husband is getting super tired of coming home from a full day of work just to clean the house and take over all your motherly duties while you lay on the couch and moan quietly.

I've somehow made it through the day without puking on the floor and Chris finally comes home, exhausted, and I hand over all mothering to him while I rest. Finally. And he sort of looks at me like, "Seriously, you laid on the couch all day and now you're turning Evelyn over to me so you can do more of that?!" It's really doing wonders for our marriage.
Last pregnancy there was no one to take care of, so it didn't matter that I continued to lay on the couch when Chris got home.

7. Changing dirty diapers is always vomit-inducing.

But you still gotta do it. There's no two ways around that.

8. Child #1 is extra clingy and you're afraid that she can tell that things are about to change. Big time.

Honestly, I haven't gone to the bathroom alone in weeks. She won't let strangers even look at her. She never wants Chris, just me. How does she know??

9. Prenatal appointments include trying to keep your toddler entertained and out of the medical waste trash can while trying to remember all the questions you have. 

I've only had one so far, but I was so concerned with keeping Evelyn happy that I was only half paying attention to what was going on. With pregnancy 1 my entire focus was on my pregnancy all the time!

10. You feel guilty when your child has been stuck inside the house for weeks because you're too sick and miserable to exist let alone take her to the park.

I seriously do feel guilty about this one. Whenever we have to go somewhere and we're walking to the car she tries to escape to go play in the backyard. She also tries to follow Chris outside when he leaves for work. She loves playing outside and I'm a terrible mother the end.

The good news is, this pregnancy does seem to be going faster. I don't have time to just sit and think about being pregnant, what with another baby to take care of. And Evelyn has started calling her belly, my belly, or anyone's belly, "baby" which is pretty cute.

And this was only my first trimester. Maybe it will get easier when I start feeling better. Or, you know, maybe not.

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